An adult's gotta do what an adult's gotta do

Whenever I accomplish a lot during the day, I truly feel like I'm a step ahead, a level higher than the me who doesn't. As a procrastinator, I always get a high from finding myself getting up and doing the things I need to do, especially when I really don't feel like it.

There is something to be said about these moments when I feel as though a more productive soul has taken possession of my body and gotten me going on tasks I normally find so daunting, that I perpetually put them on the back burner, reaching a point where I just scrap the entire thing, whatever it is. There are more abandoned projects than completed ones in my project chest, and nothing makes me feel worse about myself than going through that chest and seeing just what a self sabotager I am, and have been throughout my life.

As a person who wants to be a writer, I obviously keep a filled-to-the-brim folder on my computer called "Writing." At first glance, one would think that I am a writing machine, I just write, write and write some more, completing one piece after the other, whether it be an opinion column, a review of something, or a piece of short or long fiction. But let me tell you that that is not the case. Nothing is further from the truth, actually. My writing folder may be full, but it's a testament to how little successful writing I actually do, and nothing offers a clearer view of how my Attention Deficit Disorder affects my potential with anything, not just writing, as this folder I speak of.

Regardless, I am pretty sure that what's taking place, this ability to just get up and do the things I really don't feel like doing is not a case of possession, no, but rather a case of maturity. When you're immature (or at least when I was immature) you have this crazy idea that you don't have to do anything you don't want to do, and although there is some truth to that, life, the real kind, doesn't care whether you want to do something or not, you have to do what you have to do. Period.

So, today I patted myself on the back for accomplishing the things I need to do in order to live a good life, and have a bright future as an adult, mature woman who works hard and gets what she wants. Nothing is quite as motivational as that.

Something not so wicked this way comes

Some very interesting stuff is swirling about, and I can do nothing but sit back and wonder "Is this all really happening to me?"

It's not important really what it is that's swirling about, but I can't help but be amazed at how my life has undergone a complete 180 in a relatively short amount of time.

I simply can't imagine my life ever again going the same way it was going before August of this year. To think that I did nothing most days but sit at home, read books and blogs, and dream of making things happen for myself without actually working at it... it's like I'm looking at a stranger's past.

Nowadays, it takes me weeks, if not months to finish a hard to put down book (this is something I'm not very happy about). Leisurely and last-minute lunches with friends are memories impossible to make happen again before Thanksgiving, and I barely have time to sit down and watch a movie, little else review and analyze it enough to merit writing about it.

This is all good, of course, so no complaints here. I prefer having a schedule full with things that enhance my career and knowledge to sitting around and just dreaming of doing the same thing I'm actually doing.

I am so thankful for the opportunity, or opportunities really that have sprung from the simple act of registering for one class, and meeting all the people I've met along the way. Nothing beats having people doing the same thing you're doing around to eliminate feelings of failure and hopelessness. I know it sounds so drastic, this way of putting it, but writing is truly a lonely profession. To have people on your writing journey(s), is to have premium gas put in your car.

And that's all I've got to say about that... other than keep it comin'!

Fictionally moving forward

Late last night I checked my e-mail. After I deleted a bunch of junk, my eyes got completely fixed on one e-mail. The word "Editor" in the address it came from was an indicator that this wasn't junk, even though AOL flagged it as questionable. My eyes then moved to the subject, and I got further assurance that this wasn't some trick by spammers who happened to figure out what makes me tick-- it was the title of a short story I had sent out a number of days ago.

Opening the e-mail, I expected either a rejection, or a big fat "YES, WE'LL PUBLISH YOUR STORY!" So, I opened the e-mail and found that it was neither. What I found was a request to send the manuscript for a short story I had apparently just queried this online publication about.

For those who don't know, queries are usually sent in without a manuscript attached. Instead, they are just a "I have this idea/manuscript I think you might like. Just say the word, and I'll send it to you," kind of thing.

Some publications go to great lengths to make sure they are not swamped with unwanted manuscripts, and ask for query letters.

As in the case of this online publication that wanted me to send my manuscript in, they ask that you download and fill out a "Query Form," which asks for a basic synopsis of your work. I find that it makes things easier, really. That way, you don't have to agonize over writing a query letter, and know exactly what they want you to tell them. I like that.

So, the e-mail I received had very detailed instructions about format, font size, font type and where my name, address and other information should go on the manuscript. I followed the instructions, got my manuscript ready to go, and within seconds, had sent it in.

Now I must wait and see if what I promised in the query form has been delivered in the eyes of this particular editor. *SIGH*

Having said all that, I truly am excited. I just wish that I had gotten the answer, instead of just an OK to send my work in. Wait wait wait. It's all a writer can do once the writing process (which entails more than just writing) is done.

In the meantime, I'm moving forward. I've been mulling over an idea for a story the last few weeks, and I feel ready to start writing it. It should be easy to find a publication where this particular story I've got in mind will fit, because though it is fiction, it is inspired by actual, very bizarre events. It is nothing that happened to me, but I'm so intrigued, my imagination has created vivid images I can draw a good, solid story from.

The idea of writing about this thing is recent, but I have been intrigued by it for months. It was last year, I believe, that this thing intrigued me and now I'm putting it to good use by writing what I hope will be an interesting story.

My own private office space

So, I have a little office space in the basement with a desk and all that should go on an office desk. I go down there to write and "work". But at times when I have writer's block, I just sit in the chair and stare at the wall infront of me. And it actually feels like I've worked, because as I stare, all the clutter in my head causing blockage of writing dissipates and all the useful thoughts & ideas sitting in the back of my head move to the front of it... and it feels so good.

Get a Freelance Life

I've been reading Get a Freelance Life, by Margit Feury Ragland. If you've ever heard of or used mediabistro.com, you should know that this book is the site's "Insider Guide to Freelance Writing." I actually bought the book a little under a year ago when the idea of freelancing was just a glimmer of a thought in my head. I read a chapter or two when I first bought it and got enough out of the book to mentally plan the basement office I finally put together less than two weeks ago. But the book sat on my shelf for months before I put the necessary information it provided to work for me.

As Lisa, Marisa Tomei's character in the movie My Cousin Vinny put it: "They didn't teach you that in law school?" Only in my case, the question would've been "They didn't teach you that in journalism school?" And like Vincent Gambini's answer, mine is "No."

Being a journalism grad doesn't mean you have the knowledge necessary to survive in the real world as a journalist, particularly a freelance one. At least, that's been my experience. What I learned as a Journalism student was how to write a good lede and article, AP Style and journalism ethics. Don't get me wrong, those are essential skills that definitely help you survive in the real world, but like love... they're just not enough.

One of the many things I had no clue how to do before I read Get a Freelance Life was how to write a good query letter. More importantly, I found out what a query letter really encompasses. I learned that a query letter is so important, that it can eliminate the need for a resume altogether. Also, I thought I really knew the types of articles out there, and upon reading the section explaining what types of articles are out there, I realized I was close to being clueless in that area.

The cool thing about Get a Freelance Life, is that it not only covers the writing part of freelancing, but it also covers everything else a freelance writer must take into account. For instance, it gives pointers on how to organize finances, whether to incorporate yourself or not, and how to find an accountant and lawyer to handle your freelancing business issues and expenses.

Though I'm not completely finished with Get a Freelance Life, I feel like I've gained a treasure trove of knowledge that will help me immensely. I've gained a better view of what is possible for me to write and where it is possible for me to write it.

Though college gave me the skills necessary to be a good writer, Get a Freelance Life finishes the job of teaching good writers how to be successful writers.